I’ve been in denial for a few weeks, but (weeps) I’m now officially an Injured Runner.
I’ve been feeling my knee since summer already – I can’t bend it completely without pain. But I thought ‘I can run without pain, so it can’t be not too bad.’
Then in the beginning of January I fell with my bike. But only four days later I was running again. ‘Just a bruise’, I thought. My knee felt a bit fragile during the run, but I Do Not Want To Be Injured. Since I started running, two years now, the longest break I took was 4 or 5 days. I just want to, need to run.
Last week I was almost healed, I thought. And then I fell again, in a puddle! It was frozen, but not frozen enough, and deep. How stupid can it be? As I was down I felt a terrible pain in the same knee, thinking ‘Noooooooo!!!’.
I had an interval training planned the day after, I was looking very much forward to that, because I hadn’t been training interval a few weeks, and already skipped two races. I did absolutely not want to miss it and went. It felt OK during the training, but the day after I realized it hadn’t been the best idea ever. ‘Run slow’ and ‘Take Time’ are just too hard for me. And I minimized my pain towards my trainer and my man, didn’t go to the doctor, because I didn’t want anyone to tell me I shouldn’t run for a while. How unwise and stubborn of me… This weekend I did some dance moves and again all of a sudden it hurt a lot and it felt all wrong. With a not-injured knee these moves wouldn’t have hurt so much.
So I woke up today and told myself to wise up. No running until a see a specialist. Thursday I have an appointment. I hope it’s just a bruise, and that my meniscus is not damaged. That would require an operation, and no running for a few months. That sounds like a nightmare! Just now that I am progressing so much!
I hope the price of my stubbornness and denial will not be too high. I’m so mad at myself right now! I hope SO that I will run soon again and come back stronger. And what have I learned? Listen! To my doctor, to my trainer, to my man, to my body.
So I’ll try this: